Stories of online dating
Flushed and wasted, with my panties stuffed in my coat pocket, I did my best to explain that I was just talkingwith my "friend" in the bathroom.I managed to squeeze out some crocodile tears so the officers wouldn't slap me with public indecency charges.But seriously, sometimes things go so wrong—like endless date with a cringe-worthy guy wrong—that you can't help but wonder why you're on the app in the first place.Well, SELF asked to hear your dating app horror stories, and you guys answered.One of my matches, let's call him Alex, seemed nice and helpful—but I never actually met up with him in person.A year later, I get a call from Alex, asking if he can travel cross-country to visit me, stay in my house, and meet my parents. " -Amanda, 23"I was using the same opening line on Bumble for every guy—' You can only listen to one song for the rest of your life. '—when one of them (we'll call him Alan) replied, ' Does that line actually work for you?He seemed pretty normal (good job, intelligent, funny).
It seemed he was desperate for me to A) ask who this mystery girl was; B) say nasty things about her in return.
I was the one who drunkenly suggested having sex in a public bathroom.
On my way out, I was yanked aside for questioning by police officers on suspicion of prostitution.
You know, like when singles met potential mates at corn husking bees or whatever.
Dating apps have given us unprecedented access to every nut job, borderline sociopath, and bunny boiler in Chicago, and having a nightmarish experience has become some sort of twisted rite of passage. We asked a handful of Chicagoans to share their worst online dating stories, and we were not disappointed.
He said 'I thought you ditched me,' and then he started getting choked up and actually started crying!